Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize