SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
