i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
