HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
