okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
