Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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