You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
