all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Randomize
