Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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