And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Randomize
