weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I think my fart just growled at me.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
