It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Randomize
