I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
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