yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
