Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
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