Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
