Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
There's even glitter on my cock...
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