dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
