remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize