the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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