I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
