I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
