so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
