I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
