Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
