Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
