My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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