that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
