Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
