Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Randomize
