Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Boobs are out for the taking
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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