Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Randomize