We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
