I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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