drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize