At least make sure they are 18
Why
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
