Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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