smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
