It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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