He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
