Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Randomize
