Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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