sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
