i already hear my dad disowning me
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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