Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
