U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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