Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize