Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
