i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
