Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
